Thursday, April 25, 2013

Looking Back

I read an autobiography of my life that I had written back in 2008 during my first semester in college. Isn't it crazy to realize how much different our concerns were five years ago? Little did I know then where I would be sitting now. Then again, even a year ago, it would have shocked me.

Something I wrote in this autobiography really struck me. Regret is something I haven't truly known before my entrance into graduate school. Today, I do not sense regret, but not having it has been nearly impossible, and six months ago, I surely failed at not feeling it. I cannot regret things in my life, because they not only have made me who I am today, but the bad times always make us appreciate the good. Always.

I had written: "
regret is simply a mark of substantiality in life." Gosh, isn't that true? If we have a life in which we never struggle with regret, a life in which we make mistakes, it probably isn't a life worth living. And once we understand this, we will truly have no regrets.

With my past aim to be a psychologist, I always wanted to help people - mentally and emotionally rather than physically. I realize that sometimes our plans for ourselves are not nearly as spectacular or perfect as those our destiny hold for us...yes, I wanted to help by being a psychologist. But what I really wanted was to help. And I will do just that.

I want this blog to provide support to past, present, and future drop outs. We truly are people who are shunned, even if with subtlety, and misunderstood. The best way to get true understanding is to talk to others who are going through what you are. This is what I did when I was at my lowest point...I surfed the web, and I responded on blogs to other people going through, or those who HAD gone through, what I was struggling with. And it helped and comforted me. The only thing that helped more than talking to others was asking myself some crucial questions:

What do you want more than anything?
Where do you want to be in ten years?
When was a time you were doing something that made you extremely happy and fulfilled?

Answer these questions honestly, and  take it from there. Be HONEST. If you have been miserable for a long time, you probably have also been lying to yourself. But you will know if you are not being honest with yourself, deep down.

I encourage all students to contact me - anyone needing guidance. I am here, as you were for me.